So….I took this screen-shot a few minutes ago.

Staten Island News

ummm….

Stabbings, guns, and…pizza.

I think that about sums it up for the island in today’s news.

Anyone, human or AI, who leaves out the pizza is way off.

I mean, fellow islanders, are you for real?

Stop with the violence and anger and impatience and thoughtlessness, neighbors!

This is all  so lame.

I even see it driving on the island.

The road rage. The impatient hate-honking. Stop. Just stop!

I’d rather see Google aggregate some headlines like:

Pizza Place Offers New Prosciutto de Parma pie

Butcher Shop now offers Gabutzella (capuzzelle)

Pizza Shop wins world award for best pizza

Cultural Center Offering Classes in  Basket Weaving

Annual Beach Cleanup Soon!

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and…

man arrested for stealing award winning pizza pie fresh out of the oven

I would rather see an island like that. I acknowledge that people will step out once in a while and not act their best.

But wouldn’t it be amazing if the worst crime in a day on the nearly 500,000 person island would be theft of a piping hot pizza pie fresh out of the oven?

You know we have the best pizza. Don’t listen to that guy with that channel. Some sports dude, forgot his name. Watched his vids once and decided he has no clue.

I’ll break it down. Pizza in Brooklyn like DaVinci’s round slice in Bensonhurst and L&B Sicilian slice set the tone.

Then we have the island’s various types of pizza. To name but a few: Brother’s Sicilian. Denino’s Round (though I haven’t had since I was on West Shore Little League so it’s been a few years). Goodfella’s round pie with sundried tomatoes and fresh mozzarella. Rice Balls at Village Maria II. Giove, Italian-Italian pizza. Man, that’s just a couple. There are tons others, no offense if I left you out. I can only eat so much pizza in a week and I can’t stop eating these.

I was going to go to Culinary Institute of America, I was so into food. Buttttt…A hundred and fifty pounds lighter now, I really try to keep food limited in my life and being a chef would have been the worst choice for me, personally.

We should be focused on our culture, Italian, Albanian, Black, Korean, Nigerian, Chinese, Jewish, Indian, Mexican, Puerto Rican, Irish, Liberian, Tibetan, Sri Lankan and all the rest.

Our foods. Our love and care. Our unique ways of living life. Sharing our best.

Not our worst.

We’re not like other boroughs or towns or cities that have areas that are exclusively one race or people. 10302 is the most demographically diverse community in the city.

So for people who are biased against the island, I say * *. (Let’s see if the editors pass that. Hmmm)

You know, it doesn’t take anything to be aggressive or violent.

What is admirable is exercising restraint, especially in the face of some knucklehead who doesn’t know that’s how they should act.

Keep calm.

We are the Law and Order Borough, I mean in my own family how many cops are there?

But the real truth is, police can’t be everywhere and people are on their own to be on their best behavior most of the time.

So just go with who ever you vibe with: Jesus, Krishna, Mohammad, God, Vishnu, Moses, Buddha, whoever. You know. The Big One and those that told us be good.

Like E.T.

lol

Someone should be making you remember what’s what.  It doesn’t matter who.

As long as you remember that we’re all people and be on your best behavior all the time.

And, these kinds of headlines make me wonder if people remember to be civil, instead valuing some other ethic of “being hard,” and “a real G.”

Okay, real G-man, I hope you have fun up in Sing Sing. That’s where the men who want to feel hard end up. Ladies, too.

You don’t even need a religion. I’m not even a religious person. But I try to be moral. I really do. And I was a Catholic and was confirmed over a decade ago, but really I try to think of virtue and vice and be virtuous, not really having to do with how I was raised. I’m more of an agnostic now.

“Do to others what you would have them do to you…“

That makes sense, religion aside.

I was looking up the keyword phrase “Staten Island News” on Google.

What I found was sad and poignant, and at the same time really spot-on about where people’s heads are today.

As a Junior Editor here at the Staten Island News Service, I think it’s important to see how we rank on Google and other search engines.

So, I was working, not goofing off, I must start by saying.

Of course, the actual higher ups tell me they don’t care about ranking. They’re old-timers. They say this is a Community e-Newspaper, and that they would rather it grow from word-of-mouth, as the Staten Islander has, than rely on some “newfangled” thingmajiggy like the Google.

Yeah, I am exaggerating, they didn’t use those exact words. I guess they might as well have, though, farming their ignorance of the way the world works in more modern language. In any case, they are clueless, in my eyes. *rollseyes*🙄

But I’m writing this just to show how much the editors permit free speech. At any other news organization, I’d be canned. Not so where I work. We’re encouraged to have authentic voices.

Here’s mine.

And…yeah…they’re letting me hide behind the Junior Editor title and just have my initials showing. Yesssssssss!

Thank you Google for making material for a good story.

And, to the islanders who did all this violence and mayhem-making, why don’t you get a clue and go down to Midland Beach in the winter and watch the waves from the boardwalk and just get a clue?

And, to the Pizzeria where they’re giving a discount for congestion pricing, I think you guys are the best. Someone should do a story about you.

Screenshot Credit: (C) Copyright 2025 Alphabet, Inc.