Limitless Monday – Don’t Let Your Ego Hold You Back

Limitless Monday – Don’t let your ego hold you back

“Leave your ego at the door” is a common phrase in many areas of life.

We all have egos no matter how much we try to convince others to the contrary. Some egos are bigger than others; while some of us are capable of managing our egos, others are incapable.

The other day I realized the significance and wisdom of this statement. It’s a statement of profound meaning. My discovery is that the ego holds us back from making progress. It can also have the opposite effect by helping accelerate our growth.

Let me provide you with an example of my recent breakthrough.

In a typical Jiu-Jitsu class, there is no shortage of egos. There are a few dynamics at play. You have the beginners. These eager souls usually walk into their first class with a swollen ego. It disappears fast as soon as they are crushed and humiliated by someone half their size.

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As beginners become more proficient and start to improve their art their ego slowly repairs and re-forms. Within a year or two most beginners have rebuilt their egos. There is an important exception. While their ego is present in the dojo, that ego is sidelined as soon as they roll (spar) with students of a higher belt. The ego re-appears again when rolling with students of the same standard or below.

What I have noticed is that the more experienced one becomes, the more the ego increases in proportion to their skill. The problem is as the ego swells, we become less willing to experiment. For example, we are reluctant to try something new for fear that there is a chance you will be smashed by a student of a lesser belt or similar standard. As a result we stick with what we know. Becoming risk averse is not the way to grow both as a person or in your chosen field.

The best in their field are willing to learn new skills, from scratch if necessary. I remember when Andre Agassi reached a plateau in his tennis career. He concluded that to improve he must do something different. He began entering tournaments at a grassroot level. That strategy allowed him to rediscover his love of the game, sharpen his skills, and regain his confidence. A few months after this he was back at the top of the game. That decision meant he had to throw his ego into the wind.

The ego is driven by the fear of what others think about you. The fear of judgement. It is not easy to overcome fear, but it must be done if we are to progress in life.

Remember that as you are washing the dishes at your new restaurant, getting strangled like a chicken at your first Jiu-Jitsu class, or answering the phone at your startup, you are doing it for yourself. Opinions are irrelevant. Do what it takes to grow, one of the most effective ways being to leave your ego at the door.

I had a boss once who would pick up garbage on the floor. I had another boss who would step over it. Guess who was the more successful?

Happy Monday!

Banner Image: Karate. Image Credit – Uriel Soberanes